Nothing like waking up feeling pretty good, getting thru the morning business relatively quickly and pain-free, only to open your front door and see that someone chucked an egg off your driver's side door.
(SIGH)
(Mother Fucker!! That shit can eat paint!! I better not catch the little rat bastard that did....oh, just get in the car and go already)
Since it was still very gray this morning, I drove down towards my office, because I honestly knew of more places to get my car washed than I do in my own neighborhood. Why? Uh, my neighborhood isn't exactly known for crisp clean cars. It's more known for having a homicide two blocks away at a park over this Memorial Day weekend.
There is a WaterWay (as in Way overpriced for very little service, as you'll soon see) right down the end of the street I work on. At 7 AM I pull into the parking lot and see 2 teenagers laying out towels and setting up. I roll down the window and explain my situation. They can see the egg. "Sorry, we don't open until 7:30". Yup, the entrepreneurial spirit is dead and gone. These kids could have told me it was $50, I would have paid it. I knew today was going to be near 90 in Denver, and since my car is black, had the sun hit that egg, my paint job was as good as gone. $50 or $6,000 for a new paint job and clear-coat? Pretty simple math to me. The two knuckleheads were kind enough to tell me to go across the street to the gas station with the car wash.
Gotta love honest people. I pulled into that gas station and walked in and asked the guy behind the counter if his car wash was working...
"Not for you it isn't"
Huh?
"I saw you pull into the station, you have egg on your car. You need to power wash that thing at a self-serve place."
He was right, but he also didn't know where I could find one of those fine places. My gut kinda knew of a place, and I appreciated this guy's honesty. At least he was sarcastic about it.
I found a place that was all coin-operated. I had $3 in quarters in my change cup. 6 minutes of high pressure water on egg. It wasn't going to be enough. So I reached into my pocket, and all I had was $2!!! I usually have at least $20 on me, at least since I've been back to work. I ran over to the change machine and they had the quarter token option or the $1 token option. Put my $2 in the dollar option, and before I could look down someone had left another $1 token in the cup. $3, coming up. I got the egg off, but I didn't trust it. Add to it that I hadn't held a high pressure trigger since my limo driving days, and it was 7 AM, I was spent.
Since I didn't trust it, I called a detail shop. And boy did I find a great one. They took care of my car as best as they could.
While I paid my credit card off two weeks ago, I had to charge it again. (Sigh). It was for the right reasons, though, right?
Moral to the story? Parents don't let your kids chuck eggs at cars, it ain't right. Oh, and if you see any of those little fuckers doing this act of vandalism, shoot 'em. Yeah, I said it!
Boarding a plane in 33 hours....
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Now playing: Nappy Roots - Good Day
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