Well, for all of my male readers (that means both of you), I will give you fair and ample warning that this is a super duper deluxe John J. Crapper of a blog...so ya might want to print this out and bring it with you for taking the Browns to the Super Bowl. (if you don't get that joke, you probably don't know me that well and should stop reading, heretofore.)
So, it's been well over a month since I last typed anything on this here webspace, we've got a lot to catch up on...so here goes:
Dude, where have you been?
Well, I've been to Minneapolis, Las Vegas, and home here in Denver. But that's just a physical location, like a GoogleMap type of answer. All sorts of fun has happened along the way, but here it is to catch you up to speed--
My Dad has Cancer-now you know. Don't look at me sad. Don't need to tell me you're sorry. Why would you be sorry, did you give it to him? No, it didn't change my perspective on life, much like it does for other people who take themselves far too seriously. Pops and I haven't always gotten along, and if you tell me you have, I'm calling you a liar. However, with all that being said, the last 10 plus years that I've lived out in Colorado have been great. He's done more for me as a father in these last 10 than he almost did for me my first 22. He's been great to bounce ideas off of, to not let me get too high or too low. To call me out on my bullshit. In truth, maybe he sort of became a friend. If so, he's my best friend. We can sit next to each other, not say a word for hours on end and be fine. Never will we ask each other-"Are you mad at me?"
So, here's the good news. He had his brain surgery and everything turned out great, better than could be expected. He was out of the hospital in 2 days!!! After brain surgery, people!! There will be additional surgeries, at least on his lungs and lymph nodes. I can say today that I'm not shocked by all of this. The initial call was a bit rough. One minute you think your Dad had a mini-stroke, next thing you know it's cancer. Well, the man did smoke 3-5 packs a day for 40 some years...you do the math and tell me you're shocked he has cancer. I can't do it either.
If you need a silver lining in all of this to make you feel better (I certainly don't), know that my brother has done some amazing things. He's been thrust into a role I didn't know he could handle. Well, he's done wonders. He even has that ounce of patience people tell him would do wonders. Not only has he taken on his new role as 'family go-to guy', but he doesn't bitch about it at all. In fact, he's quite hysterical about it. We talk once or twice a week and he gives me all the info, plus some funny stuff. I always knew he was smarter than me, and I'm thrilled he's becoming responsible and mature...I can tell over the phone. The real funny thing that he and I have noticed is how many people want updates on the old man...like they were ever fans of him. Well, maybe they are and they just don't know it...little brother and I have many tendencies of the old man. What can I say, I love the old guy, he makes me giggle about how dumb this whole crazy world really is.
So, for those of you have put my Dad and family in your prayers, I say thank you. To those who haven't, why the hell not? Is it that big of a deal to tack on one more name? Sorry, Catholic guilt, it's there forever whether you want it or not. That was a joke, sorta.
The new job is fantastic
Outstanding, some might even say. I've almost changed as a person. Oh, don't worry, I still have my moments of complete rage. For example, I am not a secretary, but some people seem to think that I enjoy administrative work. Nope, not for me. I despise it. Quite frankly, it's ancillary and takes up too much time when I could be out there on the phone and pressing flesh, going to conferences and selling. I truly enjoy this role. I really like the freedom that comes along with it, too. I made the first sale in my new office and have now gone on to complete a second one as well. What does this all mean? I have no idea, because no matter what, it's just a job. My 8 months of hunting taught me I have the ability to find another one.
I've done another open mic night
My friends even videotaped it for my Dad. Of course, I had to tell my friends that my Dad doesn't find me funny, not in the least. He thinks I'm an idiot....and I really haven't done that much to prove him wrong on that front. Well, that's not entirely true. I'm pretty good when it comes to money and figuring things out...but when it comes to the ladies, I am a grade A moron.
We went out
Yup, her and I have hung out twice since my last ranting and raving...damn I'm a lunatic for this girl. She drives me insane. But maybe a lightbulb has been lit....either it will happen, or it won't. Instead of going over 8 billion scenarios that will probably never play themselves out, why not just see what happen? A novel concept, I know. For those that want to know, or care, she cranks my engine, and she's very cool. However, she seems very concerned about everyone cheating these days. I have nothing to prove on that front. I've only been cheated on, I'll never cheat. I can barely keep one girl on the brain, you think I can keep multiple going? A player I will never be.
So that's my update on the personal side....now on to the nitt-gritty...wait for it......here it comes!
Ed Hochuli
Hey Gun Show, go away. Get off my TV set. Like until the 2009 season or never again. I'm not kidding. What you did last Sunday in the San Diego/Denver ought to be considered criminal. I don't care if you're 'devastated', like head of officiating Mike Periera states. Phooey on you and your ridiculously tight zebra shirt. Phil Luckett is stoked to have you in the stable of officials who think people pay money to see them and not the game. Joey Crawford welcomes you, too. In case you've been under a rock, let me paint the picture for you....
Denver QB Jay Cutler rolls right, with the ball in his left hand...as he goes to transfer the ball to his right hand and lift it to throw, the ball slips out of his hand and San Diego recovers, giving them the win.....or so you would think.
Ed decided he would blow his whistle, killing the play at the 10 yard line and giving the ball back to Denver, who then goes ahead to score a TD and the game winning 2 pt. conversion with 1:04 on the clock. Here are my points on all of this--
First, I'm tired of Ed Hochuli. If someone were to do a study of NFL officiating crews and a)how many penalties are called, b)how many penalties are accepted and c)time it takes to explain said penalties, I'd be willing to bet a good portion of my first commission check that the Gun Show's crew leads the league, and it ain't even close. I made this observation 2 years ago amongst friends, noticed it when I went to the Broncos/Cowboys preseason game, and after this friggin' debaucle, it's now officially done in my mind. Ed Hochuli needs to be suspended for at least a year, he cost San Diego a game in the division no less. And he made me listen to Broncos fans who think their team is good. Ya beat Oakland and were given 15 points against San Diego at home...you ain't shit. Beat someone decent, will ya, and then call me.
To the Invesco Field at Mile High replay booth...you're all fired!!! This will be the other call that Ed and his staff blew. Like hooker in an alley for 5 bucks blew. Champ Bailey stripped Chris Chambers of a pass...funny, it's tough to do that when you are down. However, the refs called it a strip, SD Head Coach Norv Turner went to challenge the retarded call, but the booth wasn't functioning!!! So the Gun Show stated that he had waited the alloted 2 minutes for it to be fixed, but since it wasn't, the call on the field stood....WHAT????? This is where the NFL need to really step it up. There are only like a thousand TV monitors in the stadium, along with that huge jumbotron...maybe one of the cameras on the field has a playback? How could you not get this call corrected. Hey, next time I need a call to stand, just unplug the friggin' thing. Fucking amateurs. No wonder people still think Denver is a cow-town.
Lastly, regarding this...Shanahanigans is not a genius, he does not have cajones for going for 2. He's nuts, don't get me wrong. But think it thru. He kicks the extra point. It's now a tie game with a minute to go, and you might kick it to Darren Sproles, who has already run one back and just scampered 66 yards on a dumpoff into the flat. Wanna kick to him and take your chances? Me neither. Then there is the chance of OT. Great, but you might not get the ball. And let me add a twist none of you may have thought about. Think the Gun Show might bust out the Maybeline? That's my fancy vernacular for make-up call. Would you risk it? Me, neither.
Brett Favre, you're getting exposed. I love that Peter King and quite a few other reporters were blowing you at midfield after game 1 vs Miami. Welcome back to reality, where the Patriots beat you soundly, at home no less. Oh, and did I mention you lost to a backup who hasn't started a game in anything since like 1996? Brett, you will rue the day you begged out of Green Bay. You don't know what you got 'til it's gone. And for the record, Brett's 2nd TD pass as a Jet was a floating duck, pure luck that it landed in a teammates arms. I for one am not impressed.
Let's get this Brady nonsense out of the way right now. Fine, NFL, tell me it was a clean hit. Just remember this, and I'm the one that said it. If Rodney Harrison does the same exact thing to Peyton Manning, is he playing this week? Just a question that deserves to be answered in my book.
And fear not, Patriots fans. The D is coming. Richard Seymour is healthy. Brandon Merriweather can cover. And Jerod Mayo is on the field a whole bunch....funny, that means Adalius Thomas can rush the passer...and get sacks!
I'll have more NFL observations later during the week.
As for the rest of the news, all I can say is that if you're really voting for Barack Hussein Obama, I really gotta know why? And if your answer is change, then my retort is the same as on the latest of his TV ads, what kind of change? I'm awfully tired of hearing how now it's not just a slogan, and how he can get people to come together. Whoop-di-damn-doo. Know who else can unite people? A bad boss, that's who. Just think about it.
Oh, and all that crap about Sarah Palin banning books...turns out it was a hoax on the internet. Oh, and nice job by the hacker to get into her personal email account. How come no one has done that to Biden? I'll lay into him later, I've got to find my research on that nutbag first.
And I thought Sarah Palin's speech was great, I thought a political star was born. I'll get on the media for bashing her later as well. But now, it's damn near 2 and I've got one eye open.
Enjoy your Sunday, your families, and yourself!
