No Sports, I swear

this might be considered humor, it could be dead serious. I've got a lot of free time right now, so when I'm surfing the web for news or things that might interest me, I find myself saying the following phrase out loud, to no one...WTF???

Some of these things you may have already heard about, but if not, then you heard it here first and can go find this out with a simple search in Google. I'm going to start with the sensational news first, and go to some other stuff. Honestly, if you're looking for any commentary on sports, today just ain't your day. Sorry, other things on my mind.

Britney-Commit her? Feel Bad? Take away her kids? Is she bipolar? My take is this, leave the girl alone. Not in the same way as that crying screaming tranny on YouTube, but I think my message might be similar. Leave the girl alone. And the only reason I say this is that while I know she's doing a lot of stupid things right now, how many of us were smart at 25? Any of us have our driving mishaps on tape? I can't imagine, and I don't want to imagine, where my life would end up like The Truman Show, and it would scare the crap out of me and tick me off. There are rumors she may move to Denver, and if that's the case, great (cue the sarcasm). Just what we need here in the 9 block radius of Denver's mini-downtown-craparazzi. I know Dr. Phil tried to get into her hospital room and that alone is shady, because he wanted her on his show. Does anyone do anything for someone else just 'cuz anymore? Hollyweird is the worst. I know I'm looking from the outside in, but that's just sleazy. Britney needs something that she can never have, unless she gets adopted, and that's a stable family. I know my folks might be considered nuts by some, especially if you've met them, but I can't for the life of me think that they'd let me get this out of control. Add to it that the girls 16 year old sister gets knocked up while the guy could have legally raped her while staying at the house, what is Britney supposed to do? Who can she look to for guidance? I'm telling you, this girl may have snapped, and if she hasn't, you clowns with the camera better watch it. This is a trailer park queen from Louisiana, she could be strapped the next time and just clear some of you out. And I wouldn't blame her one bit. A few months ago she ran over someone's foot...gee, could it be due to the fact that this guy was standing damn near on top of her car??? Hmm, if I see a car moving, or about to move and I'm right next to it, I tend to back up, not let that person run over my foot and then try to sell my sock on Ebay. If you're ever really bored and want to see a crappy movie that might make you squirm, rent Paparzzi. Not a great film by any means, but tell me after you watch it that you wouldn't want to do the same thing.
I laugh at those that state she's an unfit parent. Really? Okay then, how many single moms out there? How many of them are out partying on a Wednesday night? How many are 25 or younger? I'm not saying it's right, I'm saying she's not the only one. My real advice for her is to get the hell out of Hollyweird, find an respectable Aunt or family friend, and deal with her crap. It works. The only craparazzi out in Colorado is in Aspen or Vail, they won't hang out in Denver because random drive-bys happen.
Humane Execution-read those two words again....who cares if it's humane??!! Another brilliant cause by the Pansy State. Legislators earlier this week heard arguments for humane execution. Why should they get anything less than stoning. Be thankful someone is dumb enough to cleanse the area before an injection with alcohol or iodine, in case it gets infected(What?). Add this to my presidential platform, if you kill someone, that's how you get to die, maybe slower. Here's my justification-I watch CSI, like a lot of people. I like the show, and think it's cute and convenient that they can wrap up everything in 1 hour with commercials and make it feel like their investigations go only a few days. I've got a cousin that does CSI, and he's told me it's crap, some things just hang out there. Unless you're a drifter in Georgia, and could be the dumbest criminal ever.
If you have no idea what I'm talking about, a 24 year old woman from Colorado was hiking in Georgia, and went missing. We all knew this wouldn't end well. I'm amazed at the info that has come out. This is about as open and shut of a case as I can remember in a long time. The initial report we had received out here in TV-land was that she died from a blow to the head. Not 12 hours later do we find out that her head was severely beaten but she also was decapitated. Nice. This drifter was found with blood in his van, but cut off the seat belt that had blood on it. Well the police have found the belt and matched it and the blood to the victim. Buh-bye drifter. Now he may be wanted in connection for killings in Florida. If he's found to have done anything in Florida, my solution for this bag of wind is public stoning, but no rocks, bricks. Bricks chucked at him by family members of those this stain of humanity caused harm to. And then maybe dust him off with a pair of old, dull, rusty garden shears. And don't go giving me this "you're no better than the criminal" crap I'm hearing about. It's bunk, and I can prove how to negate criminals.
Michigan's crime rate has dropped dramatically in the last 6 years, ever since they made it easier and legal to have a concealed weapon. Criminals don't like anyone shooting back at them, and a lot of people are nicer if they know that there's even a slight chance that someone is packing. Want more proof? I was driving around in a shady neighborhood with a buddy Saturday night, saw 2 deals go down, and he locked the doors. Racist? Nope. Bigoted? Nope. Smart? You damn right.
Teens want maternity leave-I wish I were kidding. I wish this was a joke, but oh no, it's so very real. Teens in this fine state of Colorado want maternity leave and for it not to count as absence while they are gone. Don't believe me?:
http://www.denverpost.com/news/ci_7899096
Damn good thing I don't run the show at Denver Public Schools-so your education is free, but the only thing you've managed to learn is that if you whine enough, you might get in front of state legislature? Hmm, you can go. The chances of you being a success in life and not mooching off of the government is minimal at best. What the hell is wrong with these girls? Where are their parents? Or I'd be willing to bet they come from single parents who got knocked up in high school, too. What ever happened to a good ol' fashioned BJ? Are all of these kids playing "Just the tip, just for a minute, just to see how it feels"? Don't they hand out condoms at public schools? Sorry, if I were a State Legislator I'd be explaining the rules of life to this group, and a big one is if you're willing to do what you think is right, then the rest of us reserve the right to treat you with the same rules we've all been playing by. You don't get to change the game just because you don't like the rules. I'm sure plenty of girls that were pregnant in high school managed to get their degree or GED. Not my problem. This is self-inflicted, why should I even have to concern myself with your absent record? Could it be because you skipped to school to go hook up with your boyfriend of 2 weeks that will now be your future Baby-Daddy? I know I'm generalizing, and this happens to all sorts of girls, but look at the picture on the link, and tell me you weren't thinking the same thing. I've got $5 that says she's either serving fries or working in a call center for Qwest in 2 years....any takers?

Look for me in 2012 running for President-the Accountability ticket. My motto is "If it is to be, then it is up to me." Everyone makes decisions, those decisions have consequences, and it's about time to pay the piper. I've had enough of listening people whine about their station in life while they refuse to do anything to improve it. I'm unemployed, do you hear me bitching? Nope, ask around. I'm doing just fine.